Just released from prison

[Malkie]

Hello to everyone on here.

I've just been released after spending a year incarcerated in a Scottish prison, for sexual crimes that I absolutely did not commit.

Unbenknown to you, this forum has been a great help to me during my imprisonment, in that it has been a fantastic support and source of friendship to my partner, who is a member here too. You gave her the strength to carry on, at times when she was ready to chuck the towel in. There were many times when she told me of useful information she'd gleaned whilst being a part of the forum, during our many phonecalls from prison. So, thank you all.

Although I have now been 'free' for 10 days, it doesn't really feel much different, if I'm honest. I have some pretty severe restrictions I'm having to adhere to, for the next 3 years (which includes the year of my sentence that I was not required to serve, due to good behaviour). From being a family of 3 that lead a comfortable life, we are now forced to live apart; my business had gone to the wall leaving me with substantial debts; our house has been repossessed; about 95% of our possessions have been stolen or left in the house or sold to make ends meet; in short, we are at absolute rock bottom.

We have a kind, sensitive, charismatic and intelligent 12-year old, who we had started the procedure to adopt when I was arrested; at present, I am ordered to have NO contact with him whatsoever - not even phonecalls or letters. This is despite him telling the police and 2 different social work teams that I have never molested him. We are missing out on perhaps the most formative years of his young life - at least he still has my partner (who is actually his grandmother).

I am convinced that my accusers weren't fully aware of the full implications that their accusations would cause - they have utterly ruined my life, which has also dragged my partner and our lad down as well. We don't know how on Earth we wil be able to make things better.

My partner - some of you may already have guessed who she is - has been an absolute rock to me. She has managed to keep my spirits up when I've been at my lowest; she's held me so that I can have the physical support of a loved one as I shed tears; she's had to endure so much yet she can still offer a smile every so oftern - I cherish every one; she's doing such a great job with our boy in my absence. Know this: without them in my life, I would be hanging from the nearest stout tree.

Now we start the process of trying to clear my name.

I really look forward to any comments.

[Lilyput]

If you are who I think you are your partner is really lovely and supportive
So sorry for your experience and I doubt being freed into this grim weather has help much either. I'd maybe make a list of things you missed, wanted to do while you were in prison that aren't restricted and go and do them. You can still enjoy life, they haven't beat you and they will not win! Always be on the lookout for new evidence that can prove your innocence, never give up! You have been through one of the hardest things a person can go through and you still here to tell the tale, that's amazing you are both amazing!

[AmandaF]

I suppose now we can also try and advise those who are suffering this under the Scottish system which is so very different from the English one.

There's no lengthy wait to see whether you're going to be charged, just a wait for a trial date , for example OH here was arrested and charged BEFORE 2 complainants had even been interviewed.

Seems all wrong but now we have to try and find a way to carry on fighting them (I am still deemed to be guilty by SS, probation and DBS)
We cannot let them do this to us with no consequences, but at least we can talk freely and try to build something.
My grandson is heartbroken and angry. He says he finds it difficult to trust anybody and finds it difficult to accept that he too was deemed to be lying.

It's another part of our journey- let's hope our destination isn't too far away

[wakingnightmare]

Hello and welcome.

I just wanted to say your other half is always really supportive, one of the first to offer encouragement to others. She is always sensible and considered and an inspiration to many.

You are in a very difficult place right now but with her by your side you'll get there.

Best wishes with your efforts.

[Lilyput]

So is everybody who is accused automatically charged there's no NFA?

[Rights Fighter]

My partner - some of you may already have guessed who she is - has been an absolute rock to me. She has managed to keep my spirits up when I've been at my lowest; she's held me so that I can have the physical support of a loved one as I shed tears; she's had to endure so much yet she can still offer a smile every so oftern - I cherish every one; she's doing such a great job with our boy in my absence. Know this: without them in my life, I would be hanging from the nearest stout tree.

Now we start the process of trying to clear my name.

I really look forward to any comments.

I have a good idea who she is.

She has also been a Godsend to this forum and to PAFAA as well. Hold on in there hon.. Things will get better.

[Casehardened]

Great to be able to meet you at last albeit in a virtual sense

You may well be at rock bottom in your life now but karma will ensure the only way is up for you both (and similarly down for your accusers)

[AmandaF]

Lilyput- from our experiences it would appear that way.

WE were both arrested and charged within hours and in my case I wasn't interviewed by the police- the untrue statements were sent to the Crown office in Edinburgh and the decision was made in just a couple of hours. I can't see where that is in any way fair or just.

Oh was charged before statements by complainants were made- one charge dropped, the other continued.
We have hard work ahead of us, but as I said at least we're a bit closer to each other and can talk freely on the phone instead of having to wait for the prison phone to be available.

It's been a lousy 2 and a half years

[Lilyput]

Hugs that does sounds VERY unfair as you can't make a decision within hours. Though i think the CPS in the rest of the UK make the decision in hours but keep the case for month and months to meet targets.

Are you are allowed to meet up when your grandson isn't around? xxx

[AmandaF]

Yes we are.

I'm going this afternoon as I have an appointment with his PO tomorrow which I think will have something to do with access. They have deemed me unsuitable to supervise as they see me as guilty .

SS are also re-starting their assessment but in the meantime I have one very upset child to deal with.

I'm sure the kids involved didn't realize what the full consequences would be- but I'm damn sure the adults behind it did.
On the repossession papers there is a space to write how the mortgage fell into arrears and I will be explaining fully, naming names etc.
I believe the hearing will be in front of the same sheriff who presided at trial, who FA misquoted when he sold his story to the tabloids. I shall make note of that too

[TBG1]

Welcome

A very warm welcome to you Malkie.


The very fact that most people knew who your BH is immediately shows the not only the high regard in which she is held, but also how supportive she has been to many.
(BH = my wife has always instructed me that I am the Other Half and that I must refer to her as my Better Half )


I'm glad that you have seen fit to introduce yourself to us and it is moving to hear how her support has helped you through an ordeal that I hope I will only have to imagine going through.


I do hope that you can find the strength to continue to fight the injustice that you and your family have suffered and I hope that you will continue to post here as you do, because you will find many supportive people here and at it's best, you might even find some useful and helpful information.


Best Wishes & Welcome,


TBG1

[Malkie]

If you are who I think you are your partner is really lovely and supportive
So sorry for your experience and I doubt being freed into this grim weather has help much either. I'd maybe make a list of things you missed, wanted to do while you were in prison that aren't restricted and go and do them. You can still enjoy life, they haven't beat you and they will not win! Always be on the lookout for new evidence that can prove your innocence, never give up! You have been through one of the hardest things a person can go through and you still here to tell the tale, that's amazing you are both amazing!

For 9 of the months I spent inside, I was lucky enough to have another prisoner of a similar age and intellect as me. We spent many an hour going over the things we missed - mainly centered around food. As you can imagine, prison food is not gourmet standard! The only problem with that was we ended up ragingly hungry!

Anyway, the thing I found that I missed the most was simply fresh crusty white bread, real butter and marmite. I REALLY missed marmite, surprisingly. And decent cheese, real coffee and roast chicken. And a proper breakfast - my first meal on the outside was a huge breakfast at a nearby Tesco.

The things I most missed were the obvious ones, I suppose. No contact with Amanda and the wee fella when I needed it, no freedom with the phone, and no internet. There'd be many a time when I'd seen something interesting on the tv and thought I'd like to go on the internet to learn more. And the radio - I'd got used to listening to some interesting radio programmes before my court case, but didn't have access to a radio in prison.

I kept a diary whilst I was inside - every single day. I used to send about 12 pages at a time out to Amanda in the post - some of the entries were very detrimental to my fellow inmates, as well as some of the guards, so I didn't want it to be discovered. Talking of the guards, most were pleasant and amusing and very approachable. One in particular seemed to watch my back for me - although I was on 'protection' there were general population prisoners in there too, who'd elected to be placed on protection.

[TBG1]

For 9 of the months I spent inside, I was lucky enough to have another prisoner of a similar age and intellect as me. We spent many an hour going over the things we missed - mainly centered around food. As you can imagine, prison food is not gourmet standard! The only problem with that was we ended up ragingly hungry!

Anyway, the thing I found that I missed the most was simply fresh crusty white bread, real butter and marmite. I REALLY missed marmite, surprisingly. And decent cheese, real coffee and roast chicken. And a proper breakfast - my first meal on the outside was a huge breakfast at a nearby Tesco.

Oh Malkie ..... I'm flippin' starving now I've read this!


I'd be interested in reading about your experiences if you ever felt comfortable sharing them. It certainly sounds from your posts that you are a very strong character and were able to channel strength from your BH on the occasions that you felt yours falter.


Right, I'm off to find somewhere to do me a fry-up!



Best Wishes,


TBG1

[Rights Fighter]

Yes we are.

I'm going this afternoon as I have an appointment with his PO tomorrow which I think will have something to do with access. They have deemed me unsuitable to supervise as they see me as guilty .

SS are also re-starting their assessment but in the meantime I have one very upset child to deal with.

One of my ladies was told that her husband would not be allowed to see their son until the son was 18. He was 12 at the time. Six months later they were seeing each other. It has bog all to do with probation and everything to do with SS.

I'd suggest bite your tongue in the meeting with the PO and concentrate on SS. Plenty of advice in the SS section on PAFAA

[AmandaF]

RF- I recently did a course at work called "Crucial conversations". It'a an American concept based on the psychological process of having difficult , emotive conversations- it has been quite helpful recently!! It's about stripping the subject to be discussed back to the bare bones , taking all the emotion and stories you may have told yourself out of the picture, just approaching the conversation with nothing but pure facts.

All I know about probation is that they believe us both guilty and unable to keep children safe. End of. That's the playing field we're on. I worry that the more I try to convince otherwise I'll be digging myself in deeper.

Case has been passed back to the SS who made the report recently. She stated that SS recommended unlimited contact, supervised by me , just no overnight stays but probation weren't happy with this and added in further concerns.

One of the points I'm trying to raise with OH's lawyer is that probation are trying to say he's guilty of grooming but that is a separate offence that was never mentioned, nor was there any evidence- well of that or anything else so I'm not sure whether they can do that.

I have some paperwork with me, one being a drawing my grandson did a few weeks ago when he was having a down time. It's all about suicide. I'll shall be showing it.

Thanks for that RF- probation seem adamant the ball is in their court.