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Nightmare! Don't trust anyone anymore!!

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  • #16
    Originally posted by priory1234 View Post
    feel like I'm running my own defence!
    This is in fact a good thing to do; after all you are one of the two witnesses to the occasion so are best placed to question the other witness on any discrepancies in her statement. Also you know her strengths and weaknesses in relation to being cross-examined.

    Obviously legally you are not allowed to question the complainant so you have to have an advocate to do this i.e. he is speaking for you, (so you do need to put the words in his mouth)

    I'm pleased to see you have already written out a list of bullet points!
    'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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    • #17
      I've done as much as I can think of. Dosn't stop me thinking about it though!

      I genuinely and sincerely thought and believed she was consenting. She never gave me indication otherwise!!! I am totally telling the truth. Totally.

      I freely admit we had physical contact. I'm NOT prepared to say we didnt. We did. But she consented.

      I did NOT do this. I am not a criminal. I work in a school for God's sake!!!!

      I have too much to loose and would NOT force myself on anybody.

      Why won't anybody believe me!!!

      sorry, it gets to me even sometimes!!

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      • #18
        That happens to all of us, to varying degrees. It's a result of being questioned by the police, and answering their questions truthfully falls on deaf ears.

        It gets even worse when you are convicted, but even from after the questioning my distrust of people in authority began.
        Nothing to be overly worried about - as there's plenty of time for you to be NFA'd yet - but once lost, trust is very hard/impossible to get back.

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        • #19
          Im sorry; there are people in worse positions than me.

          But may I ask a question please?

          NFA (I assume no further action?)

          but I've already been committed to crown court??

          how on earth can somebody be charged, told to appear at crown court, spend a fortune on legal fees and THEN told - Ops, big mistake no further action??

          that said - yes please!!!

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          • #20
            Sorry, that's my mistake; didn't see that part.

            But the fact you're at the Court stage compounds the mistrust - you said your side, no one believed you, hence where you're at. Point is, don't let the mistrust go unchecked, as it's impossible to get back.
            The reason no one believes/believed is because there's a nice big fat conviction in the offing, with the financial and promotional rewards it offers, not to mention a gold star for adding to the conviction clearup rate.

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            • #21
              yes priory, there are people in worse position than you. Fathers get accused by daughter/stepdaughter; husbands by wives and kids are also affected very much. As you read more you will found this out. That a woman's accusations can put people through court; even conflicting statements from the accuser and other people still is sometimes not enough for NFA (yes, no further action).

              I dont think NFA is possible after you are charged.

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              • #22
                I understand.

                I was bought up to trust the police. Maybe in my parents day that was the right thing to do. If ever I have kids, I'll make sure they consider the alternative.

                How much do you think this "lets just take everything to court and to hell with the consequences for the innocents out there" (sorry I'm a cynic now) is happening.

                having been through this so far, THAT'S how it feels!!

                Has it occured to anybody, this pack of lies could cost me my job anyway, send me to prison and, ruin my life whilst the so-called victim wallows in her friend's saying - "you poor thing,. Just proves all men are b's!!"

                Am I missing something????

                Even once if I'm found innocent (some hope) if this gets back to school, I'm finished

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                • #23
                  Just to clarify, you're beyond the NFA stage; you're either charged or NFA'd.

                  Yes, it does occur to me that the "victim" will wallow in self pity. And a pile of money.

                  Your particular case shouldn't go against you because your "victim" was neither underage nor under your care. However, in the current climate I can't see any school employing anyone classed as a sex offender.

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                  • #24
                    I've been trawling through the forum this afternoon.

                    I simply CANNOT belive what's happening out there!!

                    This is awful!!

                    how on earth can this situation be allowed to go unchecked.

                    I'm really glad the form is there but, very respectfully for those who started the forum, it should NEVER have been necessary.

                    I honestly thought my case was a mistake and a seldom one at that. It's not.

                    And I admit it, before i read the forum when I heard of other guys appearing in court charged with s assualt I DID think where there's smoke there's fire!! I was prejudiced, I admit it.

                    Now I'm seriously concerned that my prejudice may be the same as other peoples i.e. those on a jury!!!

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                    • #25
                      what can i say priory, welcome to the world of falsely accused! It is an eye-opening experience.

                      Give yourself time and you will see it is outrageous but this thing happens. It happened to many people, and it is happening to many of us here and I wont be surprised if there are more people joining us here; unless something changed in the process.

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                      • #26
                        you've started me thinking. Never did work out WHY she made the allegation.

                        how will she get money from it???

                        her parents (I think) arent paupers. Surely all she'll get is the attention she's always after. She likes being the centre of attention. At one point she thought about going into the media. Maybe thats what shes doing now

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                        • #27
                          It's outrageous NOW!!!

                          I only did A level law in 6th form but even at that level, I read enough to know:

                          a] innocent until proven guilty was integral to English Law

                          b] when there are TWO conflicting stories, innocent must be the verdict

                          c] the courts can't just ignore those bits of the evidence that result in a not guilty verdict when they chose too

                          WHY is this being allowed to happen???????????????

                          More importantly, WHAT do we do about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                          Just realised, even IF its confirmed I'm innocent, I can't even go abroad to teach!!!

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                          • #28
                            In an ideal world then yes - it would work like that, unfortunately targets crept in and commonsense and justice went out the window.
                            And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

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                            • #29
                              A very few trials are stopped either before the trial starts or during the course of the trial. It is unusual but it can and does happen.

                              I am sorry I couldn't get back to you earlier but I've been batting back and forth between client / solicitor / pro bono barrister on a leave to appeal hearing I am currently very closely involved in and have only just managed to get a break from it - for the time being. I'll be working on that over the weekend too which is another matter - - back to topic.

                              This does sound like a case that should not have been proceeded with and as I said earlier, this may well be recognised during the course of the trial. I'm wondering whether she has recently discovered that she could make about £11K out of tax payer's money by merely bringing this case to the police - let alone to trial.

                              It might be worth your solicitor making enquiries to CICA about this and also your barrister can apply for this information via the court if you believe this could be her primary motive.

                              Hopefully you have a good solicitor who has a good deal of experience in these matters.
                              People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                              PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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