This needed to be said, get out of my chest.

[Bene]

I don't like how I'm being treated on here, most of the time is unnecessary) I'm not always right I know, the times when I have been wrong I have apologised. Recently I've not done or said anything wrong. Yet I'm attacked for expressing my views or opinion. It feels like some people's views are more important than others. The funny thing Is the things people claim I do, others do to me all the time yet that's okay!!
I want to say that it's not okay!!! At times I feel bullied, pushed to the side!! Simply because you don't agree with what I have to say that doesn't mean I'm wrong and your right. Vice versa)
All of this is getting in the way of what's important which is helping people.
I'm so sick and tired of all of this!! It's okay for Some people who can talk to me which ever way they like) make me feel pretty crab, yet when I respond I'm a terrible person, I'm this and that!!!


A part of me really wanted to quit the forum today. But I thought to myself who cares what some worthless opinions of me stop me from doing what I love which is help people), my motives and intentions are pure. It would be such a loss to leave now. There is so much more good I can do) so many more hearts and lives I can touch by offering support to whoever needs it) Giving rape victims a voice on here!!i know that I'm a good person, with a huge heart! With lots of love and compassion to give!! That's what it's important) So I can tolerate being in an environment where I don't always feel wanted at times, in order to help others. I guess that's just my horrible traits peeking through so therefore
I would not be bullied, or manipulated into thinking I'm always in the wrong) or have my voice pushed aside because some people don't want to hear, because it's not singing the same note as there's ) I have a voice and would use it when I see thar something isn't right) If you don't like it) too bad!! You know where the logout button is I guess. I'm not like most 21 year old girls. I'm as tough as stone!!
And would take on the world!!
This is not address to everyone. Most of you are lovely people. This is for the very few that are not.

Wish you all a great night
God bless
Bene
X

[Casehardened]

As one of the functions of the moderating team (sadly due to circumstances beyond my control this is presently myself and Lawlessone rather than the usual gender mix) is to wield the big stick/delete key, I feel I need to respond with my views.

I don't censor opinions expressed by other members; obviously I do have views of my own which don't necessarily align with those of other folks but it is not good for mods to take sides so I tend not to express them and try not to get involved in discussions but keep an eye on the overall picture (to be topical I have the same function as a judge in CC)

However if the progress of the 'case' i.e. the various responses posted to a members request for support or advice is derailed by a argument between the 'barristers' or 'solicitors' it is necessary for me to step in and suggest they address their points to the 'court', i.e. all of us rather than each other (obviously it is not helpful to the member requiring support if their thread degenerates into name-calling and point scoring)

A golden rule which I commend to everyone is to express their own opinions and viewpoints by all means but avoid mentioning other member's names in these posts; that way it won't become personal and invite retaliatory posts which then becomes an argument.

I could edit inflammatory content out of a post but it is so much easier to delete the whole post; please take note of this!

At this point it might be worth reminding folks about the ignore feature:

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/f...ublesome_users

Can I block posts, emails and messages from specific users?

If there are particular members that bother you and you do not want to see their posts or receive Private Messages and Emails from them, then you can add these members to your 'Ignore List'. There are several ways to do this:

Through your User Control Panel: User CP, Settings & Options, Edit Ignore List. Then, type their name into the empty text box and click 'Okay'.

[AmandaF]

As one who has frequently locked horns here, I would just like to say no, I rarely agree with what is posted and I do see Bene making an effort to support all round.
As I have said previously, a quote from my mun "Temper your enthusiasm with discretion"- it works wonders to keep everything balanced.
My main argument has been that sweeping statements should not be made as in "You don't understand X.Y or Z ...." because hell yes, we probably do, just choose not to say anything.
It has to be remembered that on here we are coming from all different walks of life, age, gender, sexuality, experience and there is no "One size fits all".
Were I to write my life story , you'd be totally gobsmacked and would probably never ever say there are things I could not possibly understand.

I've witnessed all kinds of sexual behaviours , trends, etc. I have four adult , very attractive accomplished mixed race daughters. It became clear when they were mere teenagers that they were objects for the fetishes of some, black enough to be acceptable, not too black to be taboo. And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

We all have our crosses to bear and no-one's is heavier than the next person's. We are all prone to all extremes of emotions. Sometimes it is impossible to avoid fanning the flames.

[Bene]

I'm not a bad a person, I don't hate or dislike anyone on here, just don't agree with some opinions and viewpoints at times. it seems to me that everything I say is always interpreted the wrong way to some. Some people are so close minded and have made up their mind about about me. ( don't like her therefore everything she says Is wrong) minds that They don't even bother fully reading my response, when I try to explain myself. I'm tired of having to explain and justify myself constantly!! That's why recently I've stopped trying to do that) I give my opinion if a person doesn't agree I won't respond. I will only say it once) unless what I've made a mistake or given false information out than I would replied otherwise I can't be bothered anymore!


From now on I will only respond to people who needs help. Not everything has to be said, if you know that we but heads we will never see eye to eye than why even bother replying to me. It's a waste of time and energy.

And finally I just to address this for the finale time,
Couple of days ago, a very distress and emotionally vulnerable woman came on here asking whether she had been raped in her marriage. She explained how controlling her husband is) although most people did the best they could to help her and encourage her to leave her husband. However I feel that some people were not as compassionate or understanding torwards her situation. She wasn't shown as much compassion as let's say a false accuser on here gets.


I thought that some of the replies she got was quite harsh and not very helpful.
What most people failed to understand and take into account was the state of mind she was in and how frail she was, some people should of been more sensitive in the way they spoke to her. Unless you have being in an abusive relationship for a considerate amount of time, you would know the damage it does to ones self esteem) confidence self value and worth. So simply telling someone stop being so weak and leave him you can do better) it's not helpful or compassionate)