Moving on...

[Notinmywildestnightmares]

Hi folks, it’s been a while.

To bring everyone up to speed real quick, my ex is still my ex and I would call us amicable - though not through choice.
All comms are still being logged and I will be cutting ties soon - our house sale has finally gone through so we are on the home straight.
I have finished with my therapist for now (although I’m considering going back) and the docs have started weaning me off my anti-D’s.
I am finally making Short, Mid and Long term plans - not just short.

I have added myself across a couple of dating sites and currently have 2 possible dates lined up and thus we arrive at today’s post...

BRAIN DUMP:

I have met someone a year ago, she was everything I thought I wanted. But she didn’t feel same and after a few dates (including two stay over’s which led to some problems in the bedroom) we agreed to call time.

What am I doing? I finally have my life back on a even keal and have plans for the future (which don’t include a woman) but here I am. Arranging coffee dates and then having anxiety over actually pulling the trigger.
.

[Peter1975]

Seems to me you are trying to move on and that is no bad thing. I've had a couple of relationships since my own brush with the law and it was difficult, especially that conversation but what else is there to do? Stay in a place someone else designed for you? No thanks! FWIW, those conversations that I dreaded, turned out fine, even if the relationships didn't.

It seems to me that part of you is ready to move on and part of you wants to live in fear. I was always told that the best place to be for a relationship was where you don't need a relationship.

For full disclosure, I was in love with a girl when I was 11 years old. We went out for a couple of years. 26 years later, we met up on facebook while I was seeing someone else and living 100 miles apart. I made the wrong decision there and will regret it until my dying day because I was afraid of getting hurt.

and that is really what love is all about ; that you offer to risk getting hurt because someone is worth it to you You put that someone before yourself.

I really have lost count of the times that people have let me down but how the hell is that my fault? Why should we become cold and just give up?

Baby steps my man. You will get there.

[Notinmywildestnightmares]

Thank you, your words ring true.

discussing it with my parents they say they’re not surprised. I have been badly burnt both relationship wise and business/career wise. Therefore I don’t know who to trust and currently, don’t trust anyone.

Our first date went well. Met for coffee the conversation flowed well and we are seeing each other soon - and yet every fibre of my body is screaming at me to stop.
I have my life. I now have a direction.

[Peter1975]

Just take things easy and talk to your friends and family often.